An Extract From The Diary Of Victoria Simpson

June 15th 1890

hat night will live forever in my memory, it was the night when one of Sir Randolf Lashman's most heroic adventures began. I was lucky enough to be invited to a banquet at the Rumanian Embassy, also attending whom I knew were Sir Reg Despair and Sir Lashman. Sir Lashman's wife was also in attendance. The Embassy was delightfully decorated. During the pre-banquet assembly Sir Lashman and ourselves were introduced to many of the important people. The ambassador and his wife Isabella were terribly friendly. The Lady Isabella was especially friendly towards Sir Lashman, which I considered most unlady like. The rest of the night was spent in general merry making. After the banquet the ladies retired, until there was a loud noise. We rushed to the study only to find some of the gentlemen unconscious on the table. After they had been bought round the banquet broke up and we started to go home.

The next morning I was awoken by a knocking on the door. Upon opening the door I discovered a gentleman who gave me a message summoning me to the Foreign Office. Once there I met up with Reg and of course the brilliant Foreign Office agent Sir Lashman. We were informed that at the banquet some important papers were stolen. Due to Sir Lashman's great reputation it was decided that he should lead a group of investigators to find them. Reg Despair and I had been chosen to help him.

We departed for the Embassy. Once there we saw the Ambassador Secretary who allowed us free run of the Embassy except for the sleeping quarters where some of the occupants still were sleeping. It was decided to split up and interview the servants separately. One hour later we returned to the same place to exchange the information gained. It seemed that no one had seen anything unusual the night before, although they seemed preoccupied with some local Romanian superstition about something called a 'Vampire'. We realised that very little information could be gained. Sir Lashman decided that himself and Sir Reg should investigate the garden, whilst I went to the British Museum to find out about these 'Vampires'.

It was quite easy to find a professor who knew about such things. The information which he gave me was horrifying. Apparently vampires are undead creatures who can only be truly killed by a wooden stake through the heart. They feed upon the blood of the living by sucking it from the veins using the pointed fangs in their mouths, if the victim dies through lack of blood they will rise the next night as a vampire unless they have a stake through the heart. Luckily the vampires are said to be scared of Holy water, crucifixes and garlic. They cannot enter a house unless they have been invited. Other rumours about vampires were that they could change into bats and mist at will. It is also said that they can only come out at night as day light kills them.

I took this information to Sir Lashman. As it was fairly late by this time we went to our respective homes for the night. At about 7.30 in the morning I was awoken from my sleep by a loud knocking on the door. Upon investigation it proved to be a Constable at the door. Apparently there had been a murder in Whitechapel, the victim had been at the Romanian banquet.

When I arrived at the scene Sir Lashman was already there making inquiries! I plucked up all my courage to look at the body. It was horrendous, the throat of the victim had been torn out, on closer inspection I could see that not much blood had come out of the wound and that there were two puncture marks on the neck just on the jugular vein. This could only mean one thing, 'Vampires'. I explained the situation to Sir Lashman and we left. Whilst we were heading towards the town I happened to notice two marks on Sir Lashman's neck similar to the victim's. It appeared that he had felt very listless this morning as had his wife.

We returned to Sir Lashman's house where I checked Lady Lashman's neck and found two more marks. As we realised Sir Lashman and his wife were in trouble, we decided to go and buy crucifixes and garlic to ward off the vampires. After spending the day making purchases and talking to people at the Embassy we returned to the Lashman residence. We adorned the rooms with the garlic and crucifixes. The night passed peacefully. The next day we decided to investigate one of the Romanian Counts.

When we arrived at his residence we could see that all the upstairs curtains were closed. Sir Lashman bravely decided to sneak into the house and find out if the Count was in. Sir Lashman found an open window on the ground floor and he and Sir Despair entered. They crept up to the first floor and looked into the rooms. They found the Count asleep in one room with a lady friend.

In the afternoon we went around buying wooden stakes and a mallet. It was decided to try and find out what the Count was doing in the evening. Sir Lashman decided the best way to follow the Count was by pretending to be out with myself. We travelled to the Count's house and found out where he had gone. We also went to this restaurant. We were given a table near the Count. After a while he saw and recognised us, then he came over to talk to us. I was disgusted by him implying that a gentleman like Sir Lashman and a young lady like myself should be having an affair!! He then suggested we accompany himself and his friend to a casino. At about 11 o'clock Sir Lashman and myself decided nothing was likely o happen so we returned to our respective homes.

The next morning I was again awoken early be a policeman knocking on the door. There had been two more killings. When I arrived at the scene of the crime it turned out to be the Count and his lady friend. They had had their throats ripped out, but two marks could still be seen on each neck.

From the scene of the crime we went straight to the Embassy taking crucifixes and the wooden stakes with us. When we arrived at the Embassy we found most of the residents were still in bed.

Sir Lashman decided that we should go upstairs to investigate. The first room we came across was that of the Lady Isabella. When we opened the door we saw a coffin in the middle of the room. Then there was a loud scream as Isabella's maid saw us enter. She brought out a gun and attempted to shoot us. Sir Despair shot back and she dropped the gun. We walked over to the coffin. Upon opening it we saw the Lady Isabella. Sir Lashman courageously pulled out a stake and whilst I held the coffin lid, drove the stake through her heart. She opened her eyes and screamed, before becoming silent. We then searched her room but nothing of interest was found. The next room belonged to the Secretary, this was empty. We examined the room. After searching under the bed Sir Lashman found a box. Upon opening this box we found the stolen papers. We decided to move on to the next room which belonged to the Ambassador's brother, it was empty. Nothing of interest was found in the room,

The last room we found was the Ambassador's. Inside was a coffin. In the coffin was the body of the Ambassador. We crept over and again Sir Lashman valiantly staked the vampire. As we searched the room we found the deeds to an old house in Kent. We took this address. we went down stairs and persuaded the Secretary to come to the Foreign Office. Once there we handed over the papers and explained where they were found. The Secretary was taken into custody. The next morning he was found dead in his cell with his throat torn out. from this we concluded all the vampires were not dead. This lead us to Kent but that's a story for another day.